Jokes about lists.

Goodbye boiling water, you will be mist. All the fruits go on vacation in Pear-is. The dry-erase board is the most remarkable invention. I brought an egg to a comedy show and he cracked up. It ...Of course, even if we don’t quite understand the joke itself, it’s pretty amusing to see that even thousands of years ago, people were still making jokes where folks were walking into bars. Even better, instead of the long-faced horse from “modern” anecdotes, the Sumerians were already envisioning dogs doing this job.3. By the time you’re wise enough to watch your step, you’re too old to go anywhere. 4. A diplomatic man remembers his wife’s birthday but not her age. 5. Congratulations on being able to cough, fart, sneeze, and pee at the same time. 6. My doctor told me to start exercising so I joined aerobics for seniors.Old Age Jokes. Laughing can make you live longer. Read up on our old age jokes and “getting old” jokes to live forever. Getting old doesn’t have to be sad. Make fun of those grey hairs with ...

1. Did you hear about the first restaurant to open on the moon?It had great food, but no atmosphere. 2. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up …Vote up your favorite jokes about elephants. There are like a billion (11) elephant jokes on this list for you. So the next time you go to the zoo and need something to use to break the ice with that cute zookeeper you’ve had your eye on, These might be some perfect opening lines! They might not be, but they also might!

In today’s fast-paced world, finding ways to stay entertained is more important than ever. Whether you’re looking for a quick laugh during your lunch break or want to lighten the m...

Jan 31, 2017 · 7. When your drunk self decides to take a crack at it. ... but then gives up and delegates to sober you. 8. Or when your husband takes the list *too* literally. 9. When a 7-year-old makes a major ... Here are some great lunch joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about lunch. I ate a bad vegetarian kebab for lunch. Now I falafel. The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn’t …Five Guys. Me: “Go to bed, the cows are already asleep in the field.”. Son: “So what?”. Me: “It’s pasture bedtime.”. What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe. “I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.”. Why did the scarecrow get an award?Expect the unexpected with these clever quips that playfully twist reality on its head. From bone-dry sarcasm to subtle wordplay, each joke is uniquely crafted to keep your funny bone guessing and your mind sharp. So sit back, relax, and get ready for an unforgettable journey through the twisted realm of ironic humor. List of Jokes About Irony . 1.

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Apr 24, 2023 ... I don't know why". Tim Vine Master of the one-liner Tim Vine makes a few appearances in our epic quick jokes list (Photo: BBC). author avatar ...

Good braces jokes often rely on clever puns or word play, as exemplified by this joke: “What does a dentist do during an earthquake?” The response: “He braces himself!” One funny j...Instead of getting crisp, clean water out of the sink, you get something that resembles mud. When these moments happen, it is important to look at the bright side of life. Hire a plumber to fix your piping while you get on your phone and laptop and read through these hilarious plumbing jokes. Whatever your problem is, you will see it is not …Tick Tock Goes the Clock. Doctor: “Mr. Jones, you may want to sit down. I have some bad news and some very bad news… which would you like to hear first?”. Mr. Jones: “Oh jeez, I guess I’ll take the bad news first.”. Doctor: “The bad news” doctor notes, “is that I got your test results and you have 24 hours to live.”.There you have it, a whole warren of rabbit jokes to tickle your funny bone. Whether you came for a giggle or brought your own jokes to share, I hope you had a hopping good time! If you want to hear more funny animal jokes then check out these other great lists of jokes: Dinosaur jokes; Duck puns; Beaver jokes for; Deer jokesI made a list of the top 10 most popular wordplay jokes, to see if any of them actually made me laugh

The Funniest Music Jokes. The jokes and music puns on this list are not only funny, but they’re mostly true or at least come from a place of truth (we don’t really want to run over any conductors). Guitarists tend to think they’re the coolest guys in any room, drummers aren’t known to be card-carrying members of Mensa, and no one likes ...1_ Paul Walker has been rebuilt into a sophisticated AI. 2_ The author unplugged his grandfather's iPod, cutting off his Air Supply . 3_ Sandy hook is a nickname for clothes hanger abortions. 4_ Adolf Hitler was a good baker, especially with a gas oven.Politician jokes are a funny way to show our disagreement with their decisions and speeches. #11 . The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired you still have to show up the next day. Report. 94 points. POST. Vicky Z. Vicky Z. Community Member • Follow Unfollow. 2 years ago. Created by potrace 1.15 ...But there are some jokes that you do not have to be a professional to understand, like this very funny jokes. Every time I told them people laugh, no matter age or condition. Dentist: “You need a crown.”. Patient: “Finally someone who understands me ”. I have a very secure job.International researchers examined more than 1,000 jokes (from across the world wide web) and narrowed them down to a list of 50, and then 36,000 people voted. We love the Joke of the Day and organizations that use the Joke of the Day as a way to create a humor culture, so here are the top 10 funniest jokes ever told that you can use for your ...

When Chuck Norris was a baby he farted for the first time, scientists say this is when the big bang occurred. After Chuck Norris was born, he drove his Mother home from the hospital. Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. The problem is that he has never cried. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

24. Emergency management: “Always remember that if one engine fails on a dual-engine plane, you’ll still have enough power to safely reach the scene of the crash.”. 25. Air Force Fact: The only time you can have too much fuel is when you’re on fire. 26. An Airman and a Marine walk into the restroom at the same time.The Funniest Office Jokes And One Liners About Work. Jokes about the workplace, office politics, working, jobs, bosses, desks, etc. List of office jokes and humor, culled from TV shows, films, stand-up comedy and pop culture. These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at office humor from a variety of perspectives, and try to find humor in ...1. I’ve been trying to write a joke about elevators, but I keep getting stuck. 2. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough. 3. I heard the best time to tell jokes is when people aren’t expecting pun-liners. 4. My friend had a pet mouse named George. He always knew how to squeak by. 5.I have a joke about time travel, but you guys didn’t get it. I have a joke about being an electrician, but it’s too shocking. I have a joke about hunting for fossils, but you probably wouldn ...150 School Jokes. School can be a roller coaster of emotions, packed with joyous moments, challenging hurdles, and, of course, a significant amount of learning. But amidst all the study hours and the endless flow of homework, there’s always room for a good, hearty laugh. This collection of school jokes is designed to lighten your mood and …My manhood is only six inches, but it smells like a foot. —–. 29. A man and his family are staying at a hotel. The man asks the employee at the front desk if the adult channels are disabled. No, it’s just regular p*rn, you sick f*ck. —–. 30. Doing the business in elevators is great on so many levels.1_ Paul Walker has been rebuilt into a sophisticated AI. 2_ The author unplugged his grandfather's iPod, cutting off his Air Supply . 3_ Sandy hook is a nickname for clothes hanger abortions. 4_ Adolf Hitler was a good baker, especially with a gas oven.

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Feb 29, 2024 ... Short jokes; Food jokes; Animal jokes; More funny jokes. Ok ok, so we're ... List of IAB Vendors. DECLINE ACCEPT. Manage Settings. Continue ...

Jun 19, 2014 ... I've been asked if I can try to perfect my joke-telling skills. So here I am, accosting strangers with a list of gags. I agreed to the challenge ...Sep 17, 2022 · After reading through all these monkey jokes we hope you had a good laugh. If you want to hear more funny animal jokes, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes: Bee jokes; Jokes about dolphins; Dinosaur jokes for kids; Funny dog puns Jan 26, 2017 ... How do you circumcise a Collingwood supporter? · Why do Collingwood supporters stink? · You have a whole lot of Collingwood supporters standing on&nb...1. I’ve been trying to write a joke about elevators, but I keep getting stuck. 2. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough. 3. I heard the best time to tell jokes is when people aren’t expecting pun-liners. 4. My friend had a pet mouse named George. He always knew how to squeak by. 5.Five Guys. Me: “Go to bed, the cows are already asleep in the field.”. Son: “So what?”. Me: “It’s pasture bedtime.”. What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe. “I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.”. Why did the scarecrow get an award?This list contains 30+ of the best black jokes about black people (racist, no limits, and dark humor) that you’ll ever hear. Racist black jokes; Funny black jokes; Best black jokes; Racist black jokes. What’s white on top and black on the bottom? Society. Why do a lot of black people stink? So that blind people can hate them.A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him. “Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there ...A dyslexic boy is driving home from training with his mother. “Can we go to McDonald’s, mum? I’m hungry,” the boy inquires. “Of course, if you can spell McDonald’s, we’ll stop on the way home, son.”. The boy takes a breather, gathers himself, and begins “M…C.”. He starts to struggle. “Ah f*ck it, let’s have a KCF.”.

Yo mama's so poor, the ducks throw bread at her. Yo mama's cooking is so nasty, the house flies got together to fix the hole in the window screen. Yo mama's so depressing, blues singers come to visit her when they've got writer's block. Yo mama's so short, you can see her feet on her driver's license.Although humor is subjective, one of the funniest jokes according to Stuff You Couldn’t Make Up is: Snake one, “Are we poisonous?” Snake two, “I don’t know, why?” Snake one, “I jus...This list is primarily focused on North American and European mobilizations of discriminatory humor—often what is labeled as “ethnic humor.” The scholars represented in this reading list evaluate how allegedly harmless everyday practices—like sharing a joke—dehumanize the victims.Goodbye boiling water, you will be mist. All the fruits go on vacation in Pear-is. The dry-erase board is the most remarkable invention. I brought an egg to a comedy show and he cracked up. It ...Instagram:https://instagram. do it center panama 65 lists jokes and hilarious lists puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lists that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. Discover hundreds of funny jokes in our extensive database and directory of humorous names. Browse through our lists of jokes to find the perfect joke for any occasion. consumer cu Holiday Jokes. Halloween Kid Jokes – Perfect for lunch boxes, print these for free! Christmas jokes – Another set of hilarious jokes to print. Elf Jokes – Printable cards are perfect if you have an elf on the shelf – they are funny even if you don’t) St Patrick’s Day Jokes. Easter Jokes. car part used parts 30 Of The Funniest Jokes That Crack People Up To This Day. Justin Sandberg and. Kotryna Br. 75. 31. ADVERTISEMENT. A well-timed joke can often be the perfect pick …To Do List Puns. Today I lost my diary with all my to-do lists. I feel so listless. Holiday to-do list: 1) shoot the family 2) hang the kids 3) frame the wife. What do you call a five year old's to do list? A playlist. Did some tasks on the wife’s “to do” list; tracking device detector Tom Brady took some major hits when he was roasted by his former teammates, comedians and even Kim Kardashian during Netflix’s “The Greatest Roast of …Jan 6, 2023 · Déjà brew. What's a llama's favorite movie? "Alpaca-lypse Now." Why shouldn't you make a dinosaur mad? Because you'll get Jurass-kicked. What do math books wear under their covers? Alge-bras. cheech and chong up in smoke full movie Dec 29, 2023 · Make a noise like a carrot. A driver and a zebra are out for a drive when they get pulled over by the police. The police officer looks in the car and says “You need to take that zebra to the zoo.”. So the driver turned around and took the zebra to the zoo right away. samsung camera app They are, just as usual, a bit further down, and once you are there, do not forget to vote for the most biting, the most stinging, the most violently ironic jokes you find. After all that is well and done, share this entertaining article with your friends. After all, an irony a day keeps your mental health a-OK! #1.An example of one-line joke that plays on words is that people can’t explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they take things literally. Another play on words is that the dyslexic de... blue independence cross Father's Day jokes that'll prove you inherited Dad's funny bone. Halloween jokes guaranteed to have kids and adults cackling with delight. From corny puns to funny one-liners, these are the best ...8. Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said “parking fine.”. I don’t think you should be happy. 9. Today I’m attaching a light to the ceiling, but I’m afraid I’ll probably screw it up. Of course, you need to screw a …Apr 24, 2023 ... I don't know why". Tim Vine Master of the one-liner Tim Vine makes a few appearances in our epic quick jokes list (Photo: BBC). author avatar ... fly to belize Dec 29, 2023 · Make a noise like a carrot. A driver and a zebra are out for a drive when they get pulled over by the police. The police officer looks in the car and says “You need to take that zebra to the zoo.”. So the driver turned around and took the zebra to the zoo right away. spanish learning Nov 21, 2023 ... ... list celebrity guests, memorable comedy, and topical monologue jokes. GET MORE NBC Like NBC: http://Facebook.com/NBC Follow NBC: http ... daily game Jan 31, 2017 · 7. When your drunk self decides to take a crack at it. ... but then gives up and delegates to sober you. 8. Or when your husband takes the list *too* literally. 9. When a 7-year-old makes a major ... A white Christmas! *** Great joke for adults: whales at sea ***. A male whale and a female whale see a fishing boat – the male whale recognized the ship that caught his dad whale a year ago. He asks the female whale “let’s both get under the boat, blow air out of our air holes, and it might topple the ship.”. longitude and latitude lookup When it comes to brightening up someone’s day or breaking the ice in social situations, a funny joke can work wonders. The internet is a treasure trove of jokes waiting to be disco...The fun with deez nuts jokes is all in the setup. ‘Deez nuts’ is the punchline of a setup joke. You confuse the person and typically make them say ‘What?’, then you follow it up with the punchline that includes ‘deez nuts’. This is often followed up with saying ‘Got’eeeem’ for the full effect.Here’s a toast to butter days. Don’t grain on my parade. A mother made her son loaves of bread shaped like Batman. When in the oven, the dark knight rises. I’d tell you a joke about butter on bread, but you might spread it around. I could mop the flour with you in a bread pun battle.